In 1995, Frank Pascuzzi’s sister-in-law asked him to dress up as Santa Claus for a few hours at her Christmas party.
“She knew I was a Christmas fanatic who always wanted to play Santa,” he said. “I didn’t look like Santa Claus at the time, but I was six feet tall, about 250 pounds and had a great laugh. I sprayed my black hair with white paint and rented the suit.”
The experience, he added, was both enjoyable and enlightening. “I didn’t realize how great it would make me feel or if I had anything special to offer. Suddenly Christmas meant something again. As an adult you lose that magic. That night it came back.”
Four years later, he took his son to Macy’s to see Saint Nick. He had gained about 150 pounds by then and, in the Christmas spirit, said he was wearing a Santa hat and had his beard sprayed white for the occasion. While waiting in line, he was approached by a floor manager who asked if he was interested in a job.
“For the next five years during the holidays, I dressed as Santa Claus and saw 1,000 children a day on weekends,” he said. From there, he started playing Santa at both private parties and corporate events year round.
Suits were custom made. False beards and wigs were replaced by his real hair, colored white. In 2012, Mr. Pascuzzi, 63, who lives in Copiague, NY with his wife, Betty Pascuzzi, legally changed his name to Santa Claus. (Mrs. Pascuzzi, he said, is the only one who still calls him Frank.)
In 2015, he became an ordained minister through Universal Life Church so that he could officiate at the wedding of a couple he had befriended. “Everyone came up to me afterwards to say how much they loved the ceremony,” said Mr. Claus. “I had found my place.”
Now he does three or four weddings a year, “usually at Christmas time,” and charges $400 to officiate in an all-red suit, or a black or red tuxedo, he said. (For other events and parties, he charges between $500 and $700 an hour.) “I don’t advertise, so it’s people who know me or through word of mouth.”
Why do people want to marry Santa Claus?
They want something different. I symbolize something happy and positive. I help people forget about life’s problems. Bringing joy to others is part of the fantasy. By letting me act, they say they want to start their marriage and life together in a happy, optimistic way.
What is your service delivery process?
I send the couple a questionnaire with 20 or 25 questions. The goal is to give them a chance to have real conversations about anything and everything, to make discoveries and show them a different part of the person they are marrying. Questions range from “Who’s going to cook and wash the dishes?” to “How many children do you want to have?” Some send them back; others don’t. The answers don’t interest me, it’s a way for them to get to know each other, even if they think they already do.
What’s the next step?
If they live nearby, I meet them at a restaurant so I can get an idea of who they are. They tell me their love story and how they met. I ask them to share everything funny, quirky and weird that happened, because I like to weave that and the serious parts into the service. The couple never knows what I’m going to say, so it’s a surprise to everyone. Sometimes I write their vows; sometimes they do. I’m also at the rehearsal dinner.
What are some of the craziest things you’ve added to your ceremony?
I once took vows in the form of Dr. Suess: Do you want to love her in a boat? Will you love her in a coat? Will you love her in a house? Will you love her as your husband?
How do you close each ceremony?
I ask them, “If you’re arguing, how do you find out who wins?” Then I give them a fake gold wedding coin. One side says ‘her’, the other says ‘his’. I tell them to flip the coin and whatever it lands on that’s who wins and the other has to respect that. They agree as they stand in front of me. I’d be surprised if someone actually did it. What I’m really trying to do is find a way for them to avoid arguing. Most people don’t know how to argue correctly or soundly, or to do it in a way that doesn’t hurt each other.
What’s the biggest takeaway you want couples to eat?
Love is hard. Staying in love is even harder. I want them to get to know each other better than “I love you”. During my first marriage, which lasted only 10 years, I realized we had a lot less in common than I thought. And we didn’t have intimate conversations. For many people, love is just an emotion. An emotion can go away or change. After a while, that emotion becomes a decision. And that decision to stay in love with someone is one you make every day. Sometimes it’s a decision you make every hour.
You have been married to your second wife for 29 years. What did you learn from that marriage?
To pick my arguments and argue only about the important things, step back or stop the argument before it gets out of hand. Once you’ve said something hurtful, there’s no going back. I have learned to communicate better, to be more patient and to perceive situations differently. If you don’t communicate, your relationship will crumble. Don’t go to sleep angry. It’s simple, but ridiculously true. Because that’s how you’ll feel when you wake up, angry. That’s a terrible feeling and a terrible way to start your day. You will never know everything about the other person, but the more you know, the better your relationship will be.
What is your favorite moment during a wedding ceremony?
When the couple kisses and everyone is cheering. It is a successful moment and the beginning of their life together. I am a little piece of that moment by legally bringing two people who love each other together. That is very satisfying.