A spectacularly gruesome, ostensibly action-thriller, “The Commando” is distinguished by an incompetence that extends even to locations. The protagonist, a PTSD-torn agent for the Drug Enforcement Administration, played by Michael Jai White, lives with his family in a house on an unusually barren plot of land. The film, directed by Asif Akbar, was shot in New Mexico, where xeriscaping is in vogue, but this place is a filthy mess in every way. There isn’t even a ramp, which makes it easy for the bad guys who stage a soggy, nasty home invasion towards the end of the movie.
The reason for the invasion is a stash of bank robbery money hidden in the house. (“Hidden” is generous; the dough is mostly stuffed under floorboards that aren’t even nailed down.) The house’s previous owner, Johnny (played by Mickey Rourke), put it there before going to jail. It seems no authorities thought to search a bank robber’s home before the place changed hands. Meanwhile, the DEA agent’s teenage daughters have found and are enjoying some of the money.
Once an actor of considerable appeal and charisma, Rourke struggles to stand up here. The work of other cast members is enough for regular laughter. At one point, a member of Johnny’s clumsy gang (played by Scottish actor Gianni Capaldi) swallows a bunch of pills, remarks that “this is the calm before the storm” and, seconds later, starts growling as if experiencing the effects of a strong laxative.
“The Commando” will only appeal to connoisseurs of “how bad can it be?” cinema, as part of a control group.
the command
Rated R for violence, language, growling. Running time: 1 hour 33 minutes. In theaters and for rent or sale on Apple TV, Google Play and other streaming platforms and pay TV providers.