Fashion designer Saisha Shinde, formerly known as Swapnil Shinde, recently spoke on Instagram about how she has regained her confidence after coming out as a transgender woman.
On January 5, after completing the one-year anniversary of her announcement, she shared a few photos of herself from the time she was known as Swapnil. In the collage she added some new images in a swimming pool. The message read: “Swapnil was always aware of his body… he hated that it wasn’t manly enough (although it was all in his head). He always wore a T-shirt and went into the pool. The T-shirt sticking to the body was extremely uncomfortable as it showed his slightly feminine body and so he would stay in the pool only with his head out!
She added how the “idea of a pool party or anything related to the pool was scary”. She reasoned: “Because not every pool owner is going to allow people with shirts on! Swapnil has missed many great times until December 30, 2021.”
Today, she added, the feeling is completely different. “Recently I went into the pool… my first as Saisha! My body not in what is conventionally considered ‘in shape’, but it didn’t matter. I felt so comfortable wearing just a bra and jeans! Everything to see! I didn’t feel an ounce of insecurity or discomfort. On the contrary, I was more confident than Swapnil ever was!” she shared.
She also shared an official government document about her name change.
“Today is the first anniversary of my coming out as a transgender woman and I want to thank everyone! But besides everyone else, I want to thank myself for being brave enough to live my truth, even if it’s at a later stage in my life! Thanks to my courage and the immortal (spirit) to live a meaningful life. I can finally breathe happily… and I enjoy every second of this freedom. A freedom that I have so privileged to have achieved. Happy birthday,” she said.
She went on to write in another post: “During school and college, while the boys outside were tormenting me because I was different, the internal pain was much worse. I felt suffocated in a reality that I knew was not mine, but which I had to stage every day because of societal expectations and norms. It wasn’t until I was in my early twenties at NIFT that I found the courage to accept my truth; I really thrived (sic).”
“For the next few years I believed I was attracted to men because I was gay, but it was only six years ago that I finally accepted myself, and today I accept that for you too. I’m not gay. I’m a trans woman,” she concluded.
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